Posts Tagged ‘Attitude’

Junior Golf: Parents-Choose Your Battles

In today’s Wednesday Waggle we will open up a can of parenting worms, 1 of the toughest parts of 1 of life’s toughest jobs, being a parent. (Dufner photo golfdigest.com)img_0102-1

So where am I going here? Well depending on your personality type would you be referred to as easy-going or kind of a stickler for details or even a pain? Your interactions with your son/daughter have a huge impact on the whole relationship. How is your junior golfer interpreting your words? Is what you say uplifting and encouraging or would it be degrading and negative? What you say and how you say it is important, but even more important is how your youngster is hearing and interpreting it.

Personally I grew up having the undesirable tendency towards being critical of nearly everything and exhibiting an attitude of a perfectionist. Some folks tolerate this behavior better than others and some close friends and family members may even call you out on it and offer to help. And a number of people just don’t want to be around it. This was magnified and brought to a head when Linda’s 2 children from her 1st marriage came on the scene. It took years, but finally I was able to moderate my pain in the rear attitude. It was tough, tough on me and on everyone around me, but I didn’t like how I was and I wanted to change.

As 1 of our favorite experts on teenagers, Mark Gregston, author of Tough Guys and Drama Queens says (paraphrasing), “ If the first thing your son hears as soon as he’s in your presence is a string of gripes about everything from his hair, clothes, room, grades and everything else, why would he ever want to be near you? Nobody wants to be around that!” (Mark Gregston images amazon.com and utube)

Parents, it’s important that you pick your battles! Don’t magnify minor issues out of proportion. Obviously things that are morally, ethically or legally wrong cannot be ignored, but don’t get caught up in every little detail of your boy’s/girl’s life that might annoy or embarrass you and make it a battle.

What’s a battle? As long as it doesn’t violate the school’s dress code, does a shirt, blouse, hair style or cut, or pair of shoes warrant a war? In our thoughts, no. Is cutting class or lying a battle, yep, sure is? You get my point.

Please be the Mom or Dad of encouraging words, more positive and less to zero negative. You can do it. Listen more, talk less. A good hug and “I love you”, are highly recommended! The time with our kids flys by. Before you know it they’re on their own. Make your time together the kind of time where your kids want to be with you and you want to be with them. Really, there’s nothing else like it!

See you on #1 tee wanting to be around each other… Sam

Junior Golf: 3 Tips For Lower Scores In Bad Weather

 

In this Wednesday Waggle we will offer 3 mental postures or tips for parents to share with your junior golfers. These will help your daughter/son have an opportunity to shoot lower scores in bad weather. (Dufner photo golfdigest.com)img_0102

Few if any golfers enjoy playing in terrible conditions. It is not fun, it takes every golfer out of their normal playing/pre-shot routine and it’s more challenging to shoot a decent score. There are players who find success in nasty weather. Let’s look at how they do it.

Last weekend during the PGA Genesis event at Riviera Country Club, former World #1 David Duval was asked, “How do you mentally prepare to play in this? The weather is terrible.” The host was referring to the rain and 25 mph winds battering the course and players. To paraphrase David’s response: “There are several things you need to do mentally. 1st, understand that everybody is playing in it, so it impacts the whole field. 2nd, there are players who really dislike these conditions and they are not going to play very well. 3rd, there are players who embrace these conditions and play better during bad weather than nearly everyone else. They gain strokes on the field. This weather is an excellent opportunity to move up in the standings for players who can take a breath and embrace tough playing conditions. In fact, there are some good scores out there right now.” Yes, there were some players shooting 3,4,5-under par in ugly weather.

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Hall of Fame member and 8 time major champion Tom Watson won the British Open, now The Open Championship, 5 times. After Arnold Palmer, Tom is probably the American golfer that is most loved by the British golf fans. When asked why Tom was so successful playing in the notorious and unpredictable British summer weather, 2 main reasons were offered. His ball flight was lower and thus less affected by the elements. And he was able to totally embrace the weather. It has often been said that when it was cold, windy and rainy, you couldn’t tell it by Tom Watson’s attitude. He looked like he was enjoying a sunny 75-degree day! There ya go! Attitude, attitude, attitude…positive attitude! (Tom Watson photo sporting news)

Golf is certainly a mental game and there is always another opportunity to test your daughter’s mental strengths. Ugly weather is one of those moments. She will play tournaments in cold, wet and windy conditions and these 3 tips can help her shoot a better score.

See you on #1 tee mentally ready… Sam

 

 

New Year: New Attitude

In today’s Monday Mulligan we are going to look at the new year as an opportunity to have a new attitude, a fresh start, a clean slate. Put the past behind you and have your son do it also. (photo jennleforge.com)image

It sounds so simple. A positive winning attitude is one of the most important mental aspects of playing solid competitive sports and the sooner your son addresses this issue the better off he will be. Please remember that I am not a sports psychologist. Linda and I are parents who are relating things we have personally experienced in our lives and in particular with S3’s junior golf and college golf careers.

Shaka Smart, the University of Texas Men’s Basketball Head Coach took an interesting approach to start the 2015-2016 season, he hired some former Navy SEALs to put his team and coaching staff through some of the same training that SEALs go through. The 3-day course, among other things helped players and coaches with team building, leadership and mental toughness. One of the great principles of the course is “It’s OK to be tired, but it’s not OK to quit.” What a great line! Your junior golfer will be tired after his last hole in a golf tournament. The mental and physical demands will have worn him out. And it is an age appropriate thing. It doesn’t matter if it’s 9, 18 or 36-holes, he will be tired. (photo prweb.com)image

What does this have to do with attitude? From a purely parental point of view for your son to be a competitive junior golfer, he must first genuinely enjoy playing the game. Second, he must believe that he belongs on the course with his peers, including the really good ones and third, he must be in good enough physical shape to finish his round properly. With S3 this meant even par or better on the last 3 holes. This would be a decent indicator that his golf strength, aerobic conditioning and mental abilities were able to perform at the end of the day. If your son meets these 3 criteria his mental attitude is off to a good start.

See you on #1 tee and quitting is not an option… Sam

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